Abigail Alvarez

The desk , the empty room and the conversation with a friend about relationships, yeah these are indicators that I'm back to my normal and current life, which it's not too bad and I wont complain , it just seems to be very ecstatic and idyllic sometimes, just when you write things and it gets delete it and then you try to remember every word you say while you were writing before .

This week has been full of new things ; I got a new job , so I spent the day before I actually started working , thinking about how the next day was going to be .I never really worry that much about those things , because there's always a routine that should be followed and when it gets disrupted -like i this case-by something else , I start panicking.Changes are good , just like they say .This new job has enabled me to change atmosphere and breathe a different air and above all getting into the tedious habit of waking up early , because sometimes we just have to learn things the hard way !! don't we ?.

However I shall not complain as, it's been a reflecting week , bombarding my mind with memories from the past two weeks and stupidly congratulating myself saying "o u've been doing good , despite everything I've had what it can be called a perfect life within the contest , I cant and shouldnt complain, because , i pretty much got what I wanted and should consider myself very lucky-just like everyone else, when you actually start thinking about the positive things you have-.Well,referring back to the talk about memories , on my way to the supermarket the other day , I  thought how time seems to be like molecules that dissolve in the air , but  comes back to our mind in a different shape from time to time, bringing back the great feeling of being alive , faces that made you frown , smile , close your eyes and everything in general.

Also in addition to this , I would recall the 6 days I spent in Rome , thinking about time and how much I would love to be with those I have a great affection for (like My Mum ) but again the feeling of sharing new thoughts with new faces, that again made you frown , smile and express your opinions about something , all that time spent , gets transformed into those molecules that dissolve but come back to you dressed as memories.

However , after a week of "memories" and having to face "reality".I've gone back to the ecstatic place of boredom sometimes and rejection of positive thoughts, I got the feeling on the bus again of wasting time ,but not being bothered to do anything about it.So again I'll wait in front of my pc until i get inspiration again . This is what i call natural state., waiting for an alien to take  your body to the moon and then send you back down to earth.

I dont know I had so much to say , but having written too much in the previous thing that got deleted it , made me forget what I was going to say. and I apologise for my dyslexia already , see I always have to apologise !! I'm so used to it!!

Film Recommendations of the week

In the next blog ,I would talk about Freya and six days , for now I'd just talk about two good films I've seen this week and I'm finally watching Wild Strawberries (Bergman 1957) , but can say this is an awesome film , with surrealistic scenery with a touch of realism (even thought it's not very realistic )I got surprised when I read that this film is listed as top 10 for the vatican list of films that every human being should watch. Nevertheless, I dont know why but sometimes I find Bergman a bit boring for my taste .

Father and Son (Sokurov , 2003)

This is the reflection of what I cant really explain , but my perception about Russian soul,(The scenery, words, everything, cant really describe it though) I think I'm pretty much obsessed with Tarkovsky and every russian film I watch, I always associate it with his work  somehow, well not all of them.But Sokurov is a revolutionary filmmaker (I mean , like half of Russian Filmmakers) and that is why I love him .I found this film very homoerotic and rather incestual at the beginning but then in the end you realise it's a poem to family bonds and relationships.

La Dolce Vita (Fellini , 1960)

Having come back with Rome , I had to watch a film I hadnt watched and I should have had ages ago as I'm a film student...plues  feeling kind of nostalgic for not being there anymore , I had to watch a film that reminded the places I was and what else I could choose but the sweet life of Marcello.I love this film , because even if we dont see it , it tells us how vain life can be and it refers to our continuous search for things such as love, fun and something meaningful in our rough journey in this world.I think the endless parties emphasize the message of the film about vanity and social decay in a society.